ijustlivehere | 5.) [video.]

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5.) [video.]

[Neil is locked in a sort of stand-off with Little Neil, resident cat and his namesake. Not that they are standing-- both are crouched on their stomachs on the ground with matching vacant expressions. This goes on for some time. Those who continue watching the feed, however, will eventually see Neil rise to his arms and knees and look pointedly at the screen, and then back at Little Neil, as though imploring those watching to do something about the situation at hand.

Finally, Little Neil raises a paw and swipes at Neil's face. Neil recoils for a split second, and then the two chase each other off screen.]

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{Neil follows along closely, and sniffs loudly in a very disapproving way when Stephen picks Little Neil up. He plops down on his back and rolls about on the ground, murmuring wordlessly for attention.]

[Stephen glares.]

I'm not petting you, dude. Go, like, sit in the sun or something.

[But why not? That's not fair. Neil rolls onto his knees and props himself up with his hands on Stephen's stomach. He puts his weight on one palm and then the other, alternating, kneading.]

[Ahhhh! Weeeeeeird. Okay, just to make him stop, Stephen reaches down and ruffles Neil's hair. But No Homo.]

[Neil purrs contentedly, then lets go and runs off between Stephen's legs and into the kitchen, brushing against him affectionately as he goes.

Thuds and scuffling can be heard as Neil attempts to jump onto the counter and only makes it on his third try.]

Neil! Stop it!

[Stephen follows him into the kitchen, still holding a slightly squirmy Little Neil. Neil had knocked over a bowl, and the contents is slowly spreading across the counter.]

Dude! That was my sourdough starter. It needed another two days to ferment.

[Neil slinks to the other side of the counter as quickly as he can and feigns innocence, giving Stephen his best I-Didn't-Do-It face.]

Off the counter! I don't let you sit on there normally, and especially not when you've been rubbing your hands all over the floor!

[He goes to wipe up the spill. He knows he might be acting like a jerk, but two years of culinary school left him being pretty anal about kitchen cleanliness.]

[He looks longingly at the faucet, which is what he'd been trying to reach anyway, but makes a quick decision and resigns, leaping back down to the ground. He sniffs at the spilled substance tentatively before deciding it's not good to eat, and mewls discontentedly.]

[Stephen notes the look. He pulls a mixing bowl out of the cupboard and fills it with water, then places it on the ground.]

[Neil looks up at Stephen like he's the best thing ever, then lowers his face and begins lapping at the water eagerly.]

You're probably going to want to eat today. I guess I could off-load that leftover shepherd's pie on you. Cat's eat pretty much anything right?

[As soon as Neil hears "eat," he glares at Little Neil. If there's going to be food, there is no way that guy is getting any.]

He can have the cat food, dude.

[Stephen starts puttering around the kitchen, putting together some leftovers for Neil to eat.]

You may think you're a cat, but there is no way I am letting you eat cat food.

[But Neil is a cat, so he's not really sure what Stephen is on about-- but he gets the point that he won't have to share, and that pleases him. He sits back to wait, and licks delicately at the backs of his hands.]

[Stephen finally decides that tuna casserole will go over well (yeah, he keeps tuna in the house, even if he doesn't eat it. Neil eats fish, after all). He plonks it in another mixing bowl and sets it next to Neil's water. He scoops a mewling Little Neil out of the way as he sets to work opening a tin of cat food.]

[Neil is at the tuna almost before Stephen can even set it down, eating like it's the first food he's had in years or something. When he's done, some of it is clinging to his face.]

Okay, I've fed you. Does this mean you're gonna play nice?

[He places Little Neil on the ground next to his own bowl of food.]

[But the other cat is suddenly less important now. As soon as he leaves Stephen's arms, Neil throws himself at them.]

[Eugh, dude! What did he say about No Homo?]

[Neil, with no regard for propriety or personal space or Stephen's obvious discomfort, nuzzles against Stephen and mews quietly. He's just saying thank you, what's the big deal?]